i woke up feeling something very similar to depression this morning

however i talked to the nurse and what she said helped me

she said focus on yourself and do things you love

i went down to lvl 2 to do some dancing 

it was also sunny

the summer sun radiated warmth on my arms

i felt happy

i felt free

i still can feel sad when i think about the situation and part of me has yet to process why but it is ok

people are different

i can understand me liking him for the support and being part of me

however he no longer ... i still don't believe what he said

but people are different and can feel different things

part of me even believes it is true, i like him, more because... ah it does not matter, even if my feelings were superficial to a degree, more or less, i wanted to be with him forever